Friday, January 2, 2009

Maybe I Could Be Someone's Consultant

I still have yet to find a new job. Boo hoo. But I keep seeing the same few jobs reappear on CareerNet, NYU's own personal Monster. So while I may not always know what exactly works in terms of applying for a job, at this point I consider myself an expert on what doesn't work for employers trying to appeal to students. Here are a few things to keep in mind, Mrs. Future-Boss Lady. And I'm doing you this service for free, to boot:

1. No, I cannot work 40-50 hours a week. This is CareerNet, remember? I'm a student. While I know that NYU alumni can also access the site, a surprising number of jobs "for undergraduates only" have ridiculous time commitments that could only be met by someone who regularly skips class and doesn't give a shit about school in the first place, and who wants to hire someone like that? If you need someone to work full-time, don't expect Hayden to come calling.

2. Do not tell me your job/internship/sharecropping position is "paid" and then include a ten-dollar-a-day stipend. I wish I were kidding, but I've seen this more than once. If it's an unpaid position, fine, there are plenty of kids at NYU who can afford to do that. But if you're gonna pay your student employee, pay him well. Or at least adequately. Or at least more than ten dollars a day. This also signals you to be dishonest and manipulative, and we haven't even met for an interview yet.

3. Do not withhold your information. If I don't know what company you are, how can I do research on you before coming in for an interview? Plus, it's really shady and suggests that you don't want me to know who you are. One time I applied for an anonymous counter position at a "cute cafe by Union Square," but it was really a pizza place. Beggars can't be choosers, but let me know what I'm begging for first, kay?

4. No, I cannot come in Christmas Day. I have the rest of my life to unhappily work through the holidays; let me enjoy my ability to take week-long vacations every few months while it lasts.

I know, I know, I don't have a job (well, won't have a job in a couple weeks), so I shouldn't be picky. But if I'm going to give one-hundred-and-ten percent to a job, I want to know that said job's employer has equal passion for diligence, transparency, and reason. These are not outrageous demands; frankly, they should be common courtesy, but then again, you have a job and I don't, so maybe I need to learn a thing or two. But seriously, ten dollars a day?



Vanessa said...

All totally valid points, although when I think "paid internship" I usually think "measly stipend" so I'm never too surprised to see that assumption become a reality. I just assume the word internship = 0 dollars at this point...leads to less heartbreak.

I assume my last tip did not prove fruitful to you, and I can't tell if you seem like a kid person so this may be a silly suggestion, but honestly, the best jobs posted on Careernet are the babysitting ones. Rich mommies pay a lot of money to ensure care for their child/ren, and they are usually flexible with hours.

Other than that, I am useless and about to go broke in London. Good luck with your search!

Jess and Josh said...

Bah you're off to London and I'm jealous.

I always see those babysitting jobs! I actually used to be a babysitter/camp counselor/kid person. I wonder if I've still got it. Though I suppose I shouldn't wonder out loud to said rich mommies.

And I emailed that guy but sadly never heard back. Tear. Thanks for the tips though!


Tyler said...

Apply to Starbucks and work there like me! Big discounts and free coffee? what more could i college kid ask for? Pay is probably going to suck/working for a giant corporation kinda blows but at least its something. And you could always work for them while looking for another job.

Best of luck!

Little Miss Saturnine said...

If the place near Union Square is "Pie," then I applied there too. Or, rather, I was going to until I saw that "Pie" did not refer to delicious baked goods, but instead to pizza. Ack.