Thursday, August 28, 2008

Miss me?

Probably not! I'm in Des Moines, then going to hang out at Iowa State for the night (lolololol) then going to Chicago, then DC then HOME. I'm looking forward to snuggling with my dog, watching ridiculous amounts of On Demand and getting more than 3 hours of sleep per night. Also: never driving again.

I was looking through old pictures and stumbled across this one of me at 17 in some trashy club in Berkeley. This should hold you over until my return:-Jess

Tuesday, August 26, 2008

Internet Things I Don't Understand


Jess has already talked about things she doesn't understand on the Internet. But here are a few things I don't get. Enlighten me, please:

1. Java: What is this? What is Java, why is it so important, and who named it "Java?" I think it may have to do with programming, which is one of those things I feel that everyone who uses the Internet should know but a lot of people--myself included--don't. I don't even have anything else to say about this, because I have absolutely no idea what it does or how it makes the Internet...happen.

2. Uber: So people have Uber pages. Why? What is so special about Uber? It just looks to be....a place to put pictures and text, just like the dozens of other blogging platforms out there. If anyone reading this has an Uber, please tell me why you do. And if I should get one, because I am vain.

2b (because apparently I can't count). Plug-ins: Okay, so I know that in order to use certain online media--games, for instance, or videos--you have to have plug-ins. But...why? Why can't videos just be streaming, and why do I need to add things to my Internet to play mini-golf? Can't all Web sites just use the same plug-in? Also: is this what Divx is?

3. Torrents: Everyone tells me that torrents are the best way to download stuff from the Internet, but whenever I try to use them the file extensions are all weird and it tells me I need to get a program to run it. DO I NEED A PLUG-IN? And why can't these just be normal files? And is there like a single torrent site where all torrents are found, or do you have to go to specialty sites (i.e. one for TV shows, one for music)? Do they cost money? Are they legal?

4. Web sites: I bought myself a domain name and got me a Wordpress. But I see other Wordpresses and they're all fancy and different and not like the templates Wordpress offers. Did these people use wordpress.org instead? And on a broader note...how do you make a Web site? Like, from scratch? Is it just a lot of code? There should be a program that lets you create Web sites that's similar to Microsoft Paint; like, if I wanted a box on the side for certain links, I'd draw the box and hit save, and then that box would be on my Web site, code and all. Is there an easy way to make a Web site that doesn't require you to stay locked in a basement for two weeks learning how to code?

5. LinkedIn: Is this just Facebook for the working world? If I were to get one, would it not be wise for me to post pictures of my friends drenched in vodka?

-Josh

Clin-tin-tin

""Obama is unelectable," said Kafka, who has been voting for Democrats since she registered 38 years ago. "There is no way I will vote for any ticket with Obama's name on it. I will vote for John McCain instead.""

He's only unelectable if you don't vote for him. Come on, people. I wanted Hillary to win too. She didn't. Let's move on and just get a Democrat in the White House.

http://www.npr.org/templates/story/story.php?storyId=93995059

-Josh

Nothing

I am happy to say I have nothing to report.

Well, I quit my music-promotion internship, because the idea of handing out flyers while worrying about all the homework I have to do just makes me want to kill myself five different ways. And last night my roommate and I got into our first fight--it was brief and happened in the dark, so I couldn't see his face and determine how mad he really was, but still--and now I feel like a shitty person. And the only thing I've had to eat today has been a Jamba Juice smoothie (orange refresher with a shot of daily vitamins--seriously, people, try it, limited time only) but I am only now getting hungry because I realize that the only thing I've had to eat today has been a Jamba Juice smoothie. And the database at my office is broken, so I have literally done nothing for the last half hour and will probably continue on that path until five o clock, at which time I swear to God I'm going to the first take-out restaurant I pass because I will (once again) be eating alone watching TV and trying not to think about how many single gay men there are in this city and surely one of them has to be decent boyfriend material, right?

Whew. All that said, I really have nothing to report, and it feels great. After about a week and a half of changes and moving and stress, I have finally begun to settle into my new home. I'm savoring this moment, between the end of summer and the start of school--it's so rare to be able to catch your breath and look back without needing to look forward. Although Jess and Shloo are leaving me, which actually really sucks but I'm trying to be happy for them instead of selfishly finding ways to rain on their European parade, a few other close friends are returning after summers spent in their respective suburbs (say that five times fast), so I'm excited to see them. And yes, I have to buy textbooks, which are just so expensive and yes my parents are paying for them but yes it's still a burden and I feel guilty about it. And, you know, classes start soon. But I truly love this time of year. Last night I was smoking on my patio and I actually felt a slight chill in the air, and I figured that maybe I should put some pants on (pantsless patio smoking is the best thing in the world), but then I decided that I liked the chill and wanted to feel the breeze, and pretty soon I'll be wearing my cardigans--which, knowing me, I'll start doing too early, when it's still too warm to justify such heavy attire, but I love wearing clothing I've just bought right away because I want other people to see how awesome I look even though everyone else is probably wearing the same thing--and my boots and the pollen in the air will cease their horrendous attack on my lungs, and maybe I'll actually find someone, which is the hope I always get at the turn of the new school year. Maybe he'll be in my poetry class and we'll sit by each other and slowly move, seat by seat, until we're side by side and reading each others' note and making snarky comments about the professor and then we'll go to Yaffa Cafe and get cheap wine and brown rice and then I won't feel a sense of defeat once winter break rolls around and I have no one to wish a Happy New Year to.

-Josh

Monday, August 25, 2008

Greetings from Denver: The DNC allows us to hallucinate there actually being Democrats in Colorado


We're in a Motel 6. I think there are some blood stains on the carpet. We booked our reservation too late so this was what was left, but it's teeming with conventioneers and Hispanic mamas in Obama shirts and people in pick up trucks who are maybe just here to do meth.

We're heading to downtown Denver now, and we'll be around the convention center all day tomorrow so I'll do my best to report what I can without a real press pass, aka I will talk to people in bars, protesters, others hanging around the Pepsi Center, etc.

There's also someone staying down the hall with a Hillary sign in her window. This whole thing has made me realize how much I hate Hillary. She can "release" her superdelegates to my boy Barack, but it's quite obvious that she wants her supporters to refuse to default to Obama, and in a party that is notorious for splintering violently, it is only causing damage.

I'm going to try to talk to all kinds of Dem supporters, but I'm particularly interested in talking to the Hillary ones so I can understand why they would rather vote for McCain than Obama. Seems to me like just sore loserdom, but we'll see.

-Jess

Sunday, August 24, 2008

Why I Love Best of Craigslist

By God, he's right.
("Imagine him pulling in a big drag and blowing it out all his orifices." OH JESUS.)

In other news, today I did a little promoting at the Yo La Tengo at McCarren Park Pool and it was--well, exhausting, but aside from that--a lot of fun. YLT was absolutely amazing, and they played "Stockholm Syndrome," which made the entire day in the hot sun (without sunscreen) totally worth it. Plus I got to go on stage at one point before they came on; I was only carrying some equipment, but I'm not gonna lie, it was a really cool feeling. My boss took a picture and I can't wait to see it because then I'll feel like THE ROCK STAR I'M GONNA BE WHEN I GROW UP.

-Josh