Wednesday, November 12, 2008

My Romantic Life Is So Simple and Sad, Even Random Straight Guys Get It

So I was browsing Unigo, the latest campus-connection Web site (still in Beta!) when I came across this random dude's review of NYU. Victor O., you know me too well:

The dating scene....ah. Evolves drastically from freshman to senior year. What starts as sneaking into each others dorms to drink cheap wine and forties eventually empties your already shallow pockets as you scrounge for quarters between the couch cushions to bankroll a $30 bar tab.

Yup, that about sums it up. Well, he forgot to mention the drunken threeways in U-Hall with two guys from Long Island you met at Splash while trying to not wake up your friend's roommate while your friend, who isn't part of the threeway, runs down to Walgreen's to get everyone condoms and then proceeds to watch Reba in the common room while you try not to vomit because one of the guys' cocks is huge and keeps triggering your already-sensitive gag reflex. Then the roommate wakes up and kicks everyone out and then a week later forces your friend who is also his roommate to move out. This concludes my review of the dating scene at NYU.


P.S. I hope more people start using Unigo. There are too many college-reviews-by-college-students Web sites out there already; one of them needs to become the go-to site, for the sake of high school students still figuring out where they want to go to college while studying for eighteen AP exams and writing twenty-page reports for their Model UN delegations and memorizing their lines for next spring's production of The Music Man. And Unigo could very well be it. But in order to work well and prove truly useful, a site like this needs lots of users. So...use away! And don't try to have a quiet threeway--it doesn't work.

1 comment:

Julia said...

Bahaha! Hilarious post, dude!

It pains me to say that the romantic life encompassed herein extends to the city at large and will follow you outside of your dorm room and into your first, over-priced, closet-sized apartment. But whatevs. It's all in good fun...and what fun it is!

Anyway, thanks for the Unigo mention. It's much appreciated. As a fan of your blog (been following it ever since the Jessica Roy vs. NY Literary scene scandle of Gawker fame), it was really cool (yet totally freakin random!) seeing us on here.

I hope all those poor over-worked high school kiddies listen to ya. Them's some wise, wise words. :)