Tuesday, August 26, 2008

Internet Things I Don't Understand

Jess has already talked about things she doesn't understand on the Internet. But here are a few things I don't get. Enlighten me, please:

1. Java: What is this? What is Java, why is it so important, and who named it "Java?" I think it may have to do with programming, which is one of those things I feel that everyone who uses the Internet should know but a lot of people--myself included--don't. I don't even have anything else to say about this, because I have absolutely no idea what it does or how it makes the Internet...happen.

2. Uber: So people have Uber pages. Why? What is so special about Uber? It just looks to be....a place to put pictures and text, just like the dozens of other blogging platforms out there. If anyone reading this has an Uber, please tell me why you do. And if I should get one, because I am vain.

2b (because apparently I can't count). Plug-ins: Okay, so I know that in order to use certain online media--games, for instance, or videos--you have to have plug-ins. But...why? Why can't videos just be streaming, and why do I need to add things to my Internet to play mini-golf? Can't all Web sites just use the same plug-in? Also: is this what Divx is?

3. Torrents: Everyone tells me that torrents are the best way to download stuff from the Internet, but whenever I try to use them the file extensions are all weird and it tells me I need to get a program to run it. DO I NEED A PLUG-IN? And why can't these just be normal files? And is there like a single torrent site where all torrents are found, or do you have to go to specialty sites (i.e. one for TV shows, one for music)? Do they cost money? Are they legal?

4. Web sites: I bought myself a domain name and got me a Wordpress. But I see other Wordpresses and they're all fancy and different and not like the templates Wordpress offers. Did these people use wordpress.org instead? And on a broader note...how do you make a Web site? Like, from scratch? Is it just a lot of code? There should be a program that lets you create Web sites that's similar to Microsoft Paint; like, if I wanted a box on the side for certain links, I'd draw the box and hit save, and then that box would be on my Web site, code and all. Is there an easy way to make a Web site that doesn't require you to stay locked in a basement for two weeks learning how to code?

5. LinkedIn: Is this just Facebook for the working world? If I were to get one, would it not be wise for me to post pictures of my friends drenched in vodka?



LOLSAM said...

re: 3.: I'll teach you how to do torrents. But for now, download Azureus, a free software you can find through google. Then, go to isohunt.com, type in any movie, tv show, musical artist/album/song you want, and hit search. It'll bring up a torrent. Download the torrent file. When you have it all downloaded, you'll double click on the torrent file and it'll open it in Azureus. Depending on how large the file is and how many seeders you have (don't worry, it's not important to know the lingo yet), the file could take anywhere from a minute to a few days to download. A recently released album will probably take 30 minutes, a new movie will probably take a few hours because they're new and have the most seeders. Otherwise, it's hard to estimate. Then once it's done downloading it you'll have it!

Oh, and no, it's generally not legal.

re: 5.: My mom has a LinkedIn. You don't need one.

Joan said...

3. The tricky thing about torrents is that you do have to download another program to watch most video (they're usually in .avi form). Google 'DivX' and download the player, and watch your videos on that, it's easiest. If you come across files that turn out to be a bunch of bitty files all ending with .rar, that's a whole other can of worms that you need ANOTHER program to open (I use the UnArchiver). And yeah, isohunt has everything, and most is not of the legal persuasion.
4. There are definitely lots of programs you can use to make web-pages so you don't need to learn about the coding behind them (though it is helpful if you know the coding too). I've used Frontpage and Dreamweaver, but there are probs others out there, maybe even free ones. The basically work like Microsoft Word (more than Paint), where you just point and click where you want to drop text, pics, etc.

Mazi said...

1 - javascript makes the header on this site rotate, but I (the one who set it up) doesn't really know anything about it either and just copied and pasted the code from a blogspot tutorial blog

3 - on the bit torrent front, never ever download some weird video format that a certain txt file tells you to. and if said rars or zip archive has a password that requires denying multiple pages of magazine subscriptions...it is bull shit. you never get the password, trust me. also thepiratebay.org and torrentz.com are good search sites as well

Jess and Josh said...

Okay see I hate downloading other things to use one thing, which seems to be the case with torrents.

Joan, I'm gonna check those sites out--thanks for the info. Also, best name ever.



kane said...

LinkedIn is just a site for someone to brag their "accomplishments" or to validate what it is actually that one does. If you "surf" through LinkedIn, you can see that there are a very limited number of doctors, professors, teachers, authors, listed as one's profession; that's because those professions have better things to do than create or update their LinkedIn profiles and "network" with other people. If one is good at what they do, then they need not rely on LinkedIn to market themselves. It's just another facebook/myspace "look at me" "look at me" shenanigan.

LOLSAM said...

Kane, you sound bitter. LinkedIn is for jobs where networking is necessary. It's another tool. Doctors, teachers, authors, etc. don't need LinkedIn profiles because they don't need to network with anyone. A small business consultant, on the other hand, does need to network with other professionals to get referrals, etc, and to keep his or her business going.

Still not a good place to post drunk pixxx.

Sari said...

Linkedin really is like facebook for the working world. It's a good networking tool - colleges recommend you get on there when you are looking for a job. It's great and creepy at the same time. get one!

shnitzit said...

hey it's russell....

1 - Java is a programming language that's not the same as html or what browsers read on default, so its basically a secondary language that browsers are told to read and it is inherently more complicated and can do things that html can't.

2 - not that special really it just has the art-y niche i think

2b - plug-ins are another way a browser says that your computer has to download something that the browser doesn't know how to understand in its own language, like a flash player or something. this is not what divx is, divx is a codec (a combination of code-decode) that is a way of compacting video files into usable size. it's like winzip essentially

3 - a .torrent file is a file that tells your computer how to download ANOTHER existing file from other users that have the file. to use them you have to have a program that can handle the downloads by reading the .torrent, like azureus (although that's a little outdated, use bittorrent)

4 - good websites are just a lot of code, professionals cold code. if you want help with html or something just ask...but yeah there are progs like dreamweaver that will do some stuff automatically. to be good you have to learn flash...as far as easy ways? really, just learn html and then get good with photoshop

5 - facebook for people who need it but dont want to admit to having it (professional people)



Jim Green said...

I know exactly how you feel. I've been diddling with the internet for nearly ten years and there are still things (much like you've outlined) that I find puzzling, but then I came to it late in life compared to so many.

I now write a blog for people who are non-tech savvy (like myself), albeit some of my articles have gotten a little technical. It's not just for them, but for me too. Generally, Google has most of the answers I need.


fatherless generation said...

Hahaha, good questions :) Yeah, it seems like there are about 13 billion networking/social websites these days!