Tuesday, June 3, 2008

Natural Home Beauty Remedies Are Kind of a Crock

Summer makes me bored. I work 10am-5pm, I go to the gym, I eat dinner, get stoned and go to sleep. Wake up and repeat. So I've been trying to find random things to entertain me. One of them was to experiment with home beauty remedies I found online. Big mistake that was! I tried three of them, and below are my reviews:

1. The Honey and Sugar Exfoliator

I read on some random website that you can exfoliate by mixing honey and sugar, so the other night Ashley and I mixed some up and applied it to our faces. It tasted really good, and I guess it worked okay, but it seemed like it functioned the exact same as a drug store exfoliator. So if you can't afford Neutrogena products or you ran out of exfoliator and don't feel like getting more, you could def use this mixture as a stand in.


2. The Honey Face Mask

Something about the vitamins in honey is supposed to be good for your skin. Readers on yet another random website raved that it made their skin super soft. First we exoliated with the honey and sugar and then rinsed our faces with warm water to open our pores. Then we squeezed some honey into the palms of our hands and spread it all over our faces and let it harden. After 20 minutes, we washed it off with cold water to close our pores. My face felt the same as it does every day. Baby soft, bitches. But I attribute that to my moisturizer and toner, and not to the honey. There's no harm in trying it, I guess.


3. The Olive Oil Hair Mask

DO NOT DO THIS. No seriously, don't. Unless your hair is so unbelievably dry that it breaks when you run your brush through it, please do not put olive oil in your hair. Olive oil is for cooking, not conditioning. Last night I heated up a mug of olive oil in the microwave for 20 minutes and then applied it all over my hair, attempting to avoid my roots. I left it in for about 15 minutes and then shampooed my hair. I brushed through it and I looked like a fucking guido with an oil slick on top of my head. I guess I didn't wash it out thoroughly enough but what the fuck? I went to sleep and when I woke up this morning I looked homeless. I vigorously scrubbed my hair, shampooing it twice - once at the beginning of my shower, and once at the end. It still kind of looks like shit, so much so that I wore my hair UP today which I never, ever do (much to the chagrin of my mother). I'm hoping another shampooing session will get rid of the nasty oil. Ugh. What the fuck was I thinking?


-Jess

2 comments:

Stephanie said...

I would venture to say the problem with the olive oil was that you used too much. Most of the "recipes" I see suggest a few tablespoons - not a whole mug.

Jess and Josh said...

No no I didn't use a whole mug. I put a few tablespoons into a mug so I could heat it up. The problem was that I don't have the right hair type for this kind of thing.