Tuesday, December 11, 2007

Go hug your mom, and if you don't have one, sry I know that's kinda awk

My mom made me this website because I'm sick.


Aren't moms the best? Too bad I never want children. They drain you of your independence, finances and personal self-worth. Your things become their things. You see yourself only in their image. Their success is your success. And if they lose the beauty pageant because their bangs were a little flat, then you too lose the beauty pageant and need to get another perm. You never get to live the life you wanted. Want to go to France? Too bad your baby needs $2,000 in diapers. Want to fuck a rockstar? Too bad your curfew is 8pm, 9:30pm if there's a PTA meeting. My mom used to smoke pot and now she can't anymore because she has to be responsible; but it's okay I do it enough for the both of us.

So go hug your mom, whether or not you like her or not. I declare this day faux-mother's day. If your mom's a bitch or she's dead or whatever, sry. =(

-Jess

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