Tuesday, November 13, 2007

Mac Attack

The Mac Dictionary is a wonderful thing. Sometimes, it is also a hilarious thing. The hilarity usually lies in the example sentences it gives for its definitions; from the inane to the non-informative to the borderline offensive, there's always fun to be had when you absolutely have nothing better to do. Here are today's selections:

Gay- "(of a person, esp. a man) homosexual : That friend of yours, is he gay?"
I like this sentence because it not only avoids actually explaining the definition of the word in context, but also seems to be coming from the point of view of a sad closet-case or insecure new-gay, too naive to have developed his own gaydar and too stupid to realize that if he has to ask, then the other guy probably isn't interested.

Nerd- "a foolish or contemptible person who lacks social skills or is boringly studious : one of those nerds who never asked a girl to dance."
WELL MAYBE HE'S GAY. (Or, the sentence could be describing a girl who is straight and would therefore never ask another woman to dance.)

Black- "2 (also Black) of any human group having dark-colored skin, esp. of African or Australian Aboriginal ancestry : black adolescents of Jamaican descent."
What, did the Mac Dictionary writers blindfold themselves and pick a random country from the world map, and hope it wasn't in Europe? Before landing on Jamaica they probably got, like, Sudan, but didn't want to go near that one.

Cotton- "a soft white fibrous substance that surrounds the seeds of a tropical and subtropical plant and is used as textile fiber and thread for sewing : an Indian hammock woven in colored cottons."
The thing about this one is, they give two perfectly fine example phrases before this one. But nope, they just had to blindfold themselves again and pick a country whose exports are exotic and made-by-underpaid-children-enough to be "woven" but not so far gone that they wouldn't use cotton. The Mac Dictionary people probably hated International Day when they were in elementary school.


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